Wednesday, October 30, 2013

The Great Sugar Buzz

Face it, you get all costumed up because you make the kids and pets look adorable in their expensive, uncomfortable get-ups and you can take a whole memory card full of poses that will embarrass them for the rest of their natural lives. The adults do so in order to get away with lewd and innebriated behavior at the various parties around town.

Ooooo...spooky! Where I'm from, in wasn't uncommon to have snow on Halloween, so not only did a kid have to wear the world's best costume, but also had to wear cold weather gear underneath. What good is a cape and a big red S when it's zipped under a big coat? As soon as you were out the door, the costume became unimportant. It was all about the stash of candy you were about to collect, therefore the entire idea of scaring anyone or anything was far from your mind. It had been all about pleasing the parents for the pictures before they went out after you got back.

By the time you got home, your costume looked like it had been accosted by every dog in the neighborhood, but your sack of goodies glittered like jewels on the kitchen table. Then the candy police who looked a lot like your parents sorted through all the stuff they didn't trust for you to consume. It was strangely coincidental that it was all the stuff they liked.

Then you dug in. You spent the rest of the night being unable to sleep and having your belly snarl at you with the wide variety of gut-bombs you inhaled for fear a sibling would steal your stash during the night.

No one felt very good the next day, so I'm thinking that is where the whole idea of ghosts and goblins really came from. After a day or two the candy magically disappeared and the parents post-party flu followed soon after. The ghoulies struck again!

What am I doing for Halloween this year? I'm sickin' Lily the Terrorist on them and whoever outruns her will get to keep their can of Dr. Pepper. I just hope they let it settle a bit before they trying opening it after all that running!


Friday, October 25, 2013

Be Careful Who You Wish A Happy Thanksgiving To

Sometimes I find it awfully difficult to be sensitive to the opions of those around me. For instance, it isn't a good idea to ask a Harley Davidson owner if his ride is a Honda or a Chevy man's truck is a Ford. If you're not up on the latest mechanical or political marvels in the setting you're in, it is probably best to remain silent.

A Native friend and I had a pleasant conversation about Thanksgiving after talking about Halloween for a bit. He had no problem with the holiday and his family celebrated it like just about everyone else did. He was probably in his fifties.

The next day, having no thought of offending anyone, I wished another Indigenous man the same greeting and listened to a five minute tirade about how the tribes had been murdered by the invading Whites and why the so-called celebration was sacreligious and the beginning of the end of a way of life in the Americas. The fellow was all of about twenty-five years old and obviously well-coached in this area of history by some blogger lurking behind a desk somewhere.

He must have read different accounts of the original story than I did, although I'm sure that some of the brutality was true here or there and not well reported. I kept wondering why the Indians would bring food to a dinner party and hang around these strange Europeans with weird clothes and teach them how to grow crops, hunt and fish if they were being murdered. They were too smart to let that happen.

There are plenty of stories about atrocities to different tribes over time. The Whites were often greedy and fearful and starving. A lot didn't make it past the first winter after landing.

It seems to me that there was initially a good-faith effort by tribes and settlers to get along together. The settlers needed the help of the tribes to survive until they learned to do it on their own. After that happened, then all bets were off and that is were the tragic Native stories really began in earnest and the colonists became scavengers migrating west.

I'm sure my hypothesis carries no weight, whatsoever. However, I'm way older than twenty-five and something in my Cherokee and Kickapoo blood yells baloney to some who try to poke a sleeping bear with a sharp stick and expect others to mindlessly do the same.

Don't even get me started on sports mascots!


Thursday, October 17, 2013

I Wish You A Merry Browsing

Yes, I skipped a couple of holidays, but I don't think you'll mind when you read about this. The Pacific Northwest Writers Association will be releasing its 2013 catalogue of PNWA authors and their books on December 2nd! It will be a great way to find out who is writing in the Association and what they've published. You won't even have to wrap the gift! Just download it to your recipient's favorite E-reader format and don't forget to buy one for yourself, too.

I am submitting two books; "Song of the Unsung" and "Buffalo Hump." There will be many others from PNWA authors as well. It sure beats trapsing around stores at the last minute on Christmas Eve!

I hope you take the opportunity to take a peek. The reindeer'll appreciate anything you can do to lighten the load. Keep an eye out on

P.S. You do know the difference between a reindeer and a caribou, right? Read "Song of the Unsung" and find out!


Monday, October 7, 2013

Clear The Deck!

Err...maybe that should be, "Clear the log jam!" I don't think canoes had decks -- just bottoms that hopefully didn't spring any leaks. At any rate, I do believe that I am finally set to actually write something.

Oh sure, there are still a couple of small housekeeping things to do as well, but they won't get in the way of my creative process. I can get serious about "The Backbone Of The World" while sitting on my butt bone in my chair instead of working with techies trying to fix my machines over the phone.

This new project has all sorts of possibilities, not the least of which will confound the readers' minds, if I do it right. A good mind-bender is healthy for the constitution once in awhile. Here goes!


Wednesday, October 2, 2013

A Faster, Easier, Simple DoHickey To Make Your Computer Experience Better

There was a reason I held off on trying to hook up the new modem Xfinity sent to me awhile back. I had to complete some projects before chancing a major glitch that would knock me out of service for a few days.

How do I know this? Because every time I've tried to "do it myself" with easy fixes in the past, I've ended up calling in the service guys who take time to get here and spend a lot more time setting stuff up than the directions said it would take me to do.

When I finally got to the point that I was ready to give it a go, I followed all of the instructions for this new modem that looks just like my Wifi router. I unplugged the old RCA modem and plugged in the new Xfinity modem. I had all of the account numbers and secret handshake codes for the Wifi and everything ready to go.

The PC said, "Oops, Our Bad, we can't make it work. Are you sure you have everything connected?" Double- Triple- Quadruple-checked...still no luck. I noticed the unplugged RCA modem light was still flashing. It had a battery. Check the new battery came with it. Don't know if that is the problem, but still doesn't work.

Reattached the old modem and it works like a champ. The next frustration will be trying to get this figured out with customer service, which will be interesting, since the phones don't work when the old modem isn't plugged in!

I love to write. The rest kind of sucks right now!