Friday, April 18, 2014

I've Become One Of The People I Knew

When I was a Paramedic long ago I'd have a few "regulars" that seemed to show up on a frequent basis. They were the frequent fliers. They weren't system abusers. They always had a legitimate need for emergency assistance when they called 9-1-1.

I must have seen one dear little old lady a couple of dozen times before she finally died in her bed. It was not unusual to call on her at least once a month. She was severely asthmatic and whenever we entered her home, you could hear her distinct wheezing from anywhere in her house.

I thought about her last weekend as I propped myself up on the Emergency Room gurney hearing myself wheeze with acute bronchitis a lot like she used to. I had just finished a couple of out-patient kidney stone procedures the week before, so this was way beyond humorous and approaching unbelievable. This month has been unique, to say the least.

One of the things I have come to realize is the farther down your health takes you, the harder it is to do the things that are supposed to improve it, like exercise and reasonable nutrion. If you want your joints to move, you must take more pills. You get tired of preparing nice meals for one and throwing away the left-overs from three weeks ago to make room for more left-overs in the fridge. Call in the microwave dinners.

You walk around Walmart and can barely get back in the truck when you're done shopping. You walk up a hill and all the dogs in the neighborhood bark at your wheezing. Changing lightbulbs in a ten foot ceiling is a nosebleed experience and hip fracture waiting to happen.

All I can say is if someone were to try to pick a fight with me, one of two things are hopefully available; Thirty seconds worth of super-charged, lightning fast Seal Team moves, or that I will be packing my nine millimeter and leave one round for myself if I miss with the rest of the clip. Anything after that would be humiliating.

At least when I write I can live vicariously through my characters and block out the need to listen to my body getting crumpled by time! I hear it is pretty normal, but I've never been accused of that before.


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